MARRIAGE

Special offerings (sesayut tabuh rah and makala-kalaan) have been taken beforehand to the hide-out, and once safely there, it is law that the couple must consummate the wedding before the offerings have wilted. This is extremely important as these offerings alone make the marriage binding. They constitute what is called " the small legalization " (masakapan alit) , and without them the union would be considered an ordinary, illegal affair.

Thus the couple is made husband and wife before the gods, and it appears as if the elaborate ceremonies (makasapan, nganten) that follow every wedding are rather the official, public confirmation of it. They consist in the eternal purification by a priest's prayers and holy water, plus additional magic acts to ensure the couple a lucky and fruitful marriage. The great marriage ceremony is supposed to take place within the customary forty-two days after the kidnapping, but in some cases it has been performed considerably later if there is not enough money immediately available for the expensive festivities.

The couple remains in hiding, going out as little as possible, until the ransom money has been paid to the girl's father, all arrangements are concluded, and a lucky day established for the return of the couple. Representatives of the boy - his father or his friends - go, if possible on the day the girl is taken, to inform her parents and to try to placate them, since tradition demands of them to appear outraged although they may approve of the boy.

The girl's relatives do not participate in the marriage ceremonies, and it is significant that after marriage the girl takes leave of her ancestral gods and adopts her husband's. The emissaries go to the girl's house wearing krisses and in refined language they point to the virtues of the boy, to his good intentions, and to the advantages of the union.

Reluctantly the girl's father gives in, but not until the amount of the " bride-purchase " money (patumbas wadon) has been settled. I was told in Den Pasar that the sum may vary from ten thousand to forty thousand kepeng, eight to thirty-two ringgit (silver dollars) ' or even to as much as a hundred ringgit, which in normal times would be equivalent to 125,000 kepeng, quite a fortune for people that buy with kepeng the daily necessities of life.

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